44

Later today, around 12pm eastern standard time, Barack Obama will officially become the 44th president of these United States. I'm not normally an optimistic sort of guy. I'm usually in the mindset of shit happens, so be prepared for the worst. After the past eight years of mismanagement, borderline retardation, and bold faced lying by the out going administration, there is no where to look but up for the American people.

For years I've been fond of saying that this country needs an enema. I feel that the vast majority of the population is apathetic and ignorant to anything going on outside of their little bubble. Admittedly, Political Science has never been my strong suit. Yes, I took a Poly-Sci class in college but that was when Clinton was in office. Besides, I was 18 years old at the time and was more concerned about getting laid and hanging out with my friends than I was with what was going on in Washington DC.

What I am looking forward too is the Inaugural Address that Obama will be delivering. There really haven't been any memorable Inauguration day speeches over the past 50 years or so. The only lines that are remembered (for the most part) are JFK's "Ask not what your country can do for you, ask what you can do for your country." in 1961 or to go even further back to 1933 and FDR's "The only thing we have to fear, is fear itself." Both of these quotes were poignant for their time, the former while we were imbroiled in the cold war and vietnam, and the latter when the country was going through it's worst economic period ever. Those two speeches were great and uplifting. The rest of the speeches sounded like flies buzzing or interstate traffic.

The United States is in as dire straights now, as it was back then. We are needing a speech that is memorable. Something that we, as Americans, can cling to. We need hope, we need change, we need direction. We want to feel the sensation that we get when we are standing on top of a mountain after eating a York® Peppermint patty.

So, Obama, how bout that enema? I won't even hold it against you that *The OPRAH* backed you.